September 3, 2018

Rae and I took Bubba to see the Mets play the Dodgers today. He is so shy that I didn’t know if he would like it, being that packed in with so many loud people. It took him about an hour to loosen up but he loved it! He ate nachos and peanuts and he couldn’t stop smiling and laughing when everyone sang Take Me Out To The Ball Game. He loved when everyone did the wave. He’s already asking me when we can go back. The Mets won, too. Yay Mets!!

I’m trying to not think of Robbie at all. These random things keep happening to remind me of him. I hate it. The moment we sat down I heard his full name when they were announcing something. I thought to myself, Geez I’m going crazy, but Rae smacked my arm and asked me if I had heard his name. I said yes and that I wasn’t surprised. It’s like the universe doesn’t want me to get over him.

The night before I was on my bed, writing. I put The Town on because I love that movie. I’ve watched it too many times to count. I put in on more for the background noise as I was writing. The movie ended and the credits started rolling. I’ve apparently never watched it all the way through to the end because as the credits started rolling, “Jolene” came on. Thats the song that reminds me of Robbie more than any other. It’s the song that came in, that we both love. He sang it to me while we were drunk in that hotel room in Hollywood. The song that played as I fell completely and totally head over heels in love with Robbie.

It shocked me and I immediately started crying. I turned it off and went and got a drink to get myself together. I came back up and put something funny on TV and opened Facebook. The first thing I see is a family picture that Parker posted. A picture of Robbie staring right at me. Fml.

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