May 30th, 2018

I was watching the game tonight and Robbie texted me. He said he hadn’t heard from me in awhile. My heart always beats a little faster when I see his name pop up on my phone. We chatted over text about the game for a bit. He told me to keep in touch.

I wish things weren’t so awkward. I wish I could go back one year and start over but I really needed to go thru what I went thru. When I started talking to Robbie I was just sitting in my room everyday. I didn’t know how to live.

He made me happy, he made me forget. He gave me hope for a happy future. A future that didn’t include me being by myself forever.

I’m so sad that it didn’t work out. I think if Robbie hadn’t have popped up when he did then I would still be sitting in my room night after night, alone and watching TV.

He gave me hope and then I crashed, went into a depression thinking my one chance at happiness was gone.

So I stayed busy, non stop, ran myself ragged, but I came out better than I started in the end.

Everything happens for a reason.

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